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A Last-Minute Tax Day Guide for Professional Procrastinators Apr. 09, 2022
Progresstination. I accidentally uttered this recently while trying to say "procrastination." It was... Read More
Don't Let Summer Be a Bummer! Apr. 07, 2022
If you're a parent, it's time to think summer safety ... even though it's only spring. That's safety... Read More
Cower Struggle Apr. 05, 2022
I'm a 20-something single woman. I just moved to a new city where I don't know anybody. I'd like to ... Read More
Things I Wish Were April Fool's Day Jokes but Tragically Are Not Apr. 01, 2022
It is time for the worst holiday of the year. Not Tax Day, nor Columbus Day, nor Talk Like a Pirate ... Read More
Taking a Vacation from Your Vacation Mar. 31, 2022
It's bad news, I know, but, this year, you may actually have to go on vacation. Leaving your comfy C... Read More
Indisposed Mar. 29, 2022
Usually, when someone goes to the dentist, they worry about things like cavities and gingivitis and ... Read More
Muzzle-Bound Mar. 29, 2022
My wife and I got married eight months ago. Whatever I suggest for the apartment — a paint col... Read More
An Empty Brain is a Happy Brain Mar. 24, 2022
Winter is waning and spring is waxing. It's time to think about your brain. You may have been goofi... Read More
I've Got You Under My Skin Mar. 22, 2022
When I'm in the mood to be traumatized, I usually just go bathing suit shopping. Jeans shopping runs... Read More
Death Meddle Mar. 22, 2022
I knew my girlfriend wasn't right for me, and I was super unhappy. Friends I confided in kept saying... Read More
Finding Joy in a Pair of Robber Baron Shoes Mar. 19, 2022
I used to dress well, the way an extroverted retiree in Boca dresses well. I've always favored glitt... Read More
Money-Saving Gas Price Tips for Your Emotional Breakdown Mar. 12, 2022
Welcome, drivers. Have you noticed it costs approximately one IKEA dresser to fill a car with gas? H... Read More
Roiling the Royals at Work Mar. 10, 2022
Think about it. You're born into an immensely rich family and given a high-paid job in the family bu... Read More
Breaking Trump's Heart in Moscow Mar. 09, 2022
OVERHEARD in MOSCOW — If I am in the Russian president's head — and I am indeed the one ... Read More
Losing by a Hair Mar. 08, 2022
I have very short and spiky hair. In order to maintain its shape, I need to get it cut every four we... Read More
Heavy Settle Mar. 08, 2022
I'm a guy who falls into relationships too easily, ending up with women I'm not particularly interes... Read More
Positive News for the Negative Mar. 03, 2022
What could be worse than someone constantly criticizing you? What's worse is when that someone is yo... Read More
A Problem of Micro Proportions Mar. 01, 2022
Usually when one of our appliances dies, we get some kind of warning. When the dishwasher went, it s... Read More
Mud About You Mar. 01, 2022
I'm a recently divorced woman. With COVID restrictions easing up, I'd like to go out to bars again. ... Read More
